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Ask Anne: Relationship AdviceAsk Anne:
Relationship Questions

Is It Love?

Tue, Mar 24th 1998

You see Anne, I admitted to myself to being gay when I was about 14. I am now 28 and still having problems with this issue. When I was about 18 I fell in love with my best friend. I ruined a great relationship because I couldn't deal with him having girlfriends. He didn't know that I was gay, but I'm sure he suspected. It was very painful for me to be in love with him and not to get back the love that I desired. Now 10 years later I find myself in the same situation. I am once again in love with my best friend, and I am constantly depressed because I think he is realizing my true feelings for him. As a result, he is pushing me away. I know that he will never feel what I feel, and I can't deal with it. I need his friendship very badly. I'm trying to stay away from him, but it's hard since we share the same friends. I constantly run into him. Each time I go home feeling depressed because I miss him so much. Please give some advice on how to deal with this problem. I want to save my friendship with this man. I don't want to live life as a gay man, because I see lots of pain involved. I had high hopes that I could cure these homosexual feelings through some kind of therapy, but according to what I've read, it's not possible...is that true? What can I do? I've not yet been in a gay relationship, but I am in need of having some one say I love you to me too. Thank you so much for reading this letter. Please answer me as soon as possible- as I'm very desperate for a solution.

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